Computer Stupidities

[Guest]

This website collects some of the funniest things you will ever read:
Computer Stupidities
I would recommend you bookmark it and read it whenever you feel bored. Some of the things are out of date now, but it's still extremely funny!
One of my favorites from the website:

I tutored college students who were taking a computer programming course. A few of them didn't understand that computers are not sentient. More than one person used comments in their Pascal programs to put detailed explanations such as, "Now I need you to put these letters on the screen." I asked one of them what the deal was with those comments. The reply: "How else is the computer going to understand what I want it to do?" Apparently they would assume that since they couldn't make sense of Pascal, neither could the computer.

Another one:

This little bit of Java was written as part of a group project at university. The friend who passed it to me has been bouncing off the walls about the quality of the guilty party's code (silly things like defining error and success codes with the same value so you don't know what the return code means and stuff like that), but this is the most obviously stupid bit.

public int convertItoi(Integer v)
{
if (v.intValue()==1) return 1;
if (v.intValue()==2) return 2;
if (v.intValue()==3) return 3;
if (v.intValue()==4) return 4;
if (v.intValue()==5) return 5;
if (v.intValue()==6) return 6;
if (v.intValue()==7) return 7;
return 0;
}

[ZekeDragon]

My new signature just came from this site. Great find, Guest.

[Jordan]

lmao, good stuff! They should have used a switch statement:

switch (v.intValue()) {
    case 1:
         return 1;
    case 2: 
         return 2;
    ....
}

dummies.

[Orjan]

lmao@Jordan

[Vswe]

lol @ Guest
lmao @ Jordan

[Guest]

You know, someone was smart enough to use switch statements.

switch (k) {
case 9: printf("9\n");
case 8: if (k==8) printf("8\n");
case 7: if (k==7) printf("7\n");
// and so on...
}

I wondered why he put the "if" clauses, but then I noticed that none of the cases has its "break" statement, so if he found that if k was 9, the program printed 9, 8, 7, etc. So I think he added the "if" clauses to fix that behavior.